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Dear G-d...

Thursday, 26 September, 2019 - 11:19 pm

Dear G-d,

It’s that time of year again. Humanity is getting ready to crown You as King of Kings on Rosh Hashana. It’s not only because we couldn’t find a better candidate, but because we really think You’re the best.

I’m no stranger, as I pray and talk to You three times each day and You’re quite familiar with my ups and downs and our family’s journey during 5779. You are intimately aware of our challenging hours, sleepless nights and occasional moments in which I doubted You and everything You stand for, yet, I pen this letter to You, not only to get some grievances off my chest, but to ask You to try to see things from our simplistic perspective down here on earth.  

I know that in the “bigger picture” You’re awesome and take such good care of us, but “in the present” it’s hard to always perceive what You do as good, so I seek Your blessing for uncovered good. With Your “Book of Life” wide-open this season of heavenly judgment, it would be so beneficial for us if You could express Yourself in ways that even us, stressed, overworked, overwhelmed humans, could see as essentially good, if but for a moment or two.

In the Selichot liturgy we said “Rachamana D’Onei L’Svirei Liba Aneina, May the Merciful One, Who answers the broken-hearted, answer us. I ask You today, Master of the Universe, to listen as I share with You what You already know, but perhaps from a human angle that will encourage more revelation and less mystery on Your part.  

When we visit the cancer wards, especially the children cancer centers, we ask ourselves, why? Why are so many of our fellow humans experiencing so much pain? When we see a pure nine-year-old with a brain tumor lighting Shabbos candles, we ask ourselves “is there a sin that is deserving of her suffering”? Is single parenthood not hard enough that a single mom must endure breast cancer while trying to build her family Sukkah? So, I ask You dear G-d please heal them and give us all a break from this dreadful disease. Aneina

Aibershter, I know that you strolled through the IVF and infertility clinics around the globe. You’ve seen those precious couples whom You gifted with an insatiable yearning to procreate, fulfilling your commandment to “be fruitful and multiply”, yet, You’ve taken away that ability from far too many of them. I don’t think it’s fair to give them the longing but take away the prospect. I don’t think it’s OK to bless couples with a seven-month pregnancy only to lose their precious baby to a miscarriage. I don’t think it’s fair and I’m guessing You’re not too happy about it either. I know You test the righteous, but this borders on cruelty and I know You’re not cruel, so I plead with you to bless all families with an opportunity to fulfill their worthy yearnings. Aneina

When You’re done taking care of the sick and infertile, the homeless and the weak, take a second out of Your busy schedule and help my brothers and sisters who struggle with their faith in You. I’m sure, that like us, You too give them credit for struggling and not giving up, because there are moments in which we all want to give up on You. The burden You’ve placed on some of us is just too much and we don’t know what else to do but to express anger and resentment for You. We don’t hate You during those tense moments, we aren’t real “atheists”, we simply have no one else to turn to with our frustration. Think of Rosh Hashana as campaigning for office: make it a bit easier for us and we would happily vote You in again. Aneina

Sometime during Rosh Hashana as Jews in Bozeman and beyond cry, Shofars are blown, and Your people beg for a relationship, think of those among us whose childhood was stolen from them by evil people who used their positions of power to prey on those most vulnerable in society. These Neshamos are trying so hard to fit in, working to overcome, but the trauma they’ve experienced has affected them mentally, emotionally, spiritually and, sometimes, physically, making it so hard to “just move on”. Bless them to see that there is light at the end of the tunnel and help them find proper support so that they can live a brighter future. Aneina

Dear G-d, when you’re done with the big needs, see if you can help the NIH find cures for orphan diseases like Zeesy’s Glut-1. I mean, I get there are bigger issues to deal with, but government funding or, worse yet, lack of funding, shouldn’t stop great researchers from helping those that have special genetics and bring them their much-needed healing. While you’re at, please bless Zeesy in her developmental “catch-up” studies; I’d love to see her reading Hebrew sometime soon. Aneina

Hashem, there are those who are working tirelessly to save their marriages. Husbands and wives who truly love each other but can’t seem to see the beauty in each other that they once saw. These quarrels are tough and sometimes quite messy, but You are the ultimate peace maker, Oseh Shalom Bimromav, so please gift them with the ability to make amends and keep their love and like spark alive. Aneina

Father in Heaven, our homeland Israel is under constant assault. The Jew-haters have found a “secretive” way to hate Jews and it’s via “Israel”. As promised, You’ve done an awesome job protecting Israel and its citizens, but I beseech you to inspire those seeking our demise to find alternative activities besides Jew bashing. Perhaps guide them to play Sudoku or even better to fight for those truly suffering in our world; it would be nice. Aneina

Gut'nyu, send special love to all those struggling with addiction. This is not a choice, but a disease that is so terribly hard to control. These addictions come in different shapes and sizes and consume their victims in ways that are truly destructive. Allow them the opportunity to find the “G-d of their understanding” with the assistance of their fellow fighters at meetings. Aneina

If I may, Super Daddy, peek at the social service agencies, and see what you can do for all those foster kids looking for stable homes. King David wrote that You’re “Father of orphans and Judge of widows", so help these children who with no fault of their own, ended up in some pretty horrible situations and match them up with loving parents who can gift them with a decent life. Aneina

Lastly, G-d, I need you to bless our beloved America. Our country is ripped apart by political strife. Each side claims they are right, and they are fighting for our blessed future. Personally, I think there are remarkable people on both sides of the aisle, but the animosity is out of control. Send an angel or, better yet, come Yourself, and help our country heal. We need our citizens to see the good in their fellow man and woman, so that we can work together to make tomorrow brighter. Aneina

I’m wrapping up, but please don’t misunderstand me, Almighty G-d. I love You, adore You and teach my kids and community that without You there is nothing, nothing at all. Yet, I think we are on good enough terms for me to be candid with You, so that we can start off the year on the right foot. Obviously, if you want to respond, You know where to find me. You could also solve all these issues, by ushering in Mashiach and boom, it’s all better.

I hope You have a Shana Tova, Your 5780 should be filled with Nachas from Your creation and from the people who hung with You at Sinai.

Your Montana salesman,

Chaim

May You guard our brethren in Israel and the world over from harm and send us Moshiach speedily. May You protect the armed forces of Israel and the United States wherever they may be. Shabbat Shalom! Chazak!!! L'Chaim!!!


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