Want to keep in the loop on the latest happenings at . Subscribe to our mailing list below. We'll send you information that is fresh, relevant, and important to you and our local community.
Printed from JewishMontana.com

Aba, you don't understand me!

Friday, 9 November, 2018 - 8:29 am

Children, like adults, are complex beings, making the blessing of parenthood a most fascinating journey. As Chavie and I raise our children, we are constantly seeking guidance on how to better the parent/child dynamic. Whether dealing with our high schooler Shoshana, who is excelling in Florida or interacting with our four kiddos at home, we learn new things every day and it’s imperative to reassess the relationship according to what we learn. When Chaya says “Aba, I feel like you didn’t understand me”, I need to pause and work with her so that there’s better communication.

In this week’s Torah portion, Toldot, we read of Rebecca’s pregnancy. When passing a Yeshiva, she felt the baby kicking in her womb, same when she passed a place of pagan worship. It was confusing: is the kid inching towards spirituality or heading into idolatry? Will the child seek morality or depravity? When she consults with the prophet she is assured that she will have twins, her beloved Jacob and Esau, not a child with a double identity. Yet, it’s important to realize that many good people do seek out both holy experiences and secular temptations, sometimes, even simultaneously. Recognizing this fact, makes us, the parents, more suited to respond to our children and help them choose the right path. We must strive to be “in touch” with our children and convey to them that holy and fun are not mutually exclusive, but that true holiness is indeed meaningful, fulfilling and joyous.

Today marks forty-one years since the miraculous recovery of my dear Rebbe of blessed memory after suffering a massive heart attack during Hakafot on Shemini Atzeret of 1977. On this day, Rosh Chodesh Kislev, he finally was strong enough to leave his study, where he was being treated, and head back home. There are many angles to this story, including the fact that his recovery allowed me to spend my childhood with him (I was born in 81’), but what speaks most to me is the Rebbe’s insistence in staying near his Chassidim, his soul-children, as his hospitalization would’ve terrified them, and he didn’t want to ruin their holiday. When choosing closeness over convenience, we send a clear message to them: you matter. You are always important to me and I cherish this journey.

In the words of Fredrick Douglass “It’s easier to build strong children than to repair broken men”!  

May G-d guard our brethren in Israel and the world over from harm and send us Moshiach speedily. May He protect the armed forces of Israel and the United States wherever they may be. Shabbat Shalom! Chazak!!! L'Chaim!!!

Comments on: Aba, you don't understand me!
There are no comments.